After watching the Ford/Kavanaugh hearings, and especially after listening to the Republican responses, I have to follow the MSNBC commentator who felt like apologizing to all women on behalf of all men. The Republicans have become the party of child abuse, racism, sexual assault, misogyny, and toxic masculinity. And they imply that all men are this way. Idiots. Men are not angry; we’re livid. I’m even enraged at the implication that Republicans speak for me.
Republicans demonstrated that sexual assault doesn’t matter so long as it’s white Republicans against girls. Sure, Senators tried to pretend they cared about Dr. Ford, briefly, but they couldn’t keep that up more than a few minutes. Now Republicans are bragging — bragging! — that sexual exploitation and abuse up to (and probably including) rape shouldn’t matter, not to real men. They repeat the accusations of sexual assault to each other and laugh, thousands at a time. Or they whine about how it’s all so unfair. To them.
Child abuse? Republicans in the administration and Congress decided they needed to hurt refugees, especially families, because they’re brown and helpless and at risk. Officially, Republicans wanted to discourage brown people from asking us for help. And yet, they had to lie about when they started to do this; they lied about how many times; they lied about where; they lied about what they were doing, and they’re still lying to us about it now. They just transferred thousands of kids to camps in the Texas desert, far away from help, affection, possible foster homes, existing legal support, and (not by accident) oversight. They still give us no reason for the move.
Today’s Grand Old Party is defying the court order for reunification, week after week. Not because it’s policy, or because they can’t provide any help, but because they don’t care enough even to bother trying. Sure, it’s their mess, but it’s just refugees and kids. They honestly assumed that nobody would care, and even after losing their case in court, they’re still acting the same.
They hurt children! I still can’t get past that. Republicans targetted children. Did refugees brown people scare them too much? Did they think the toddlers were closet terrorists? They’re still hurting kids! And Republicans claim that anyone who doesn’t make that same choice isn’t strong enough. “Soft on borders!” they shout to each other at their echoing rallies. Being soft is shameful; being hard is a virtue. Republicans are realpolitik; Democrats are too feminine and because of that, too weak. It’s been a Republican shibboleth for decades.
I am so far past angry I can’t see straight. I cannot believe that we’re not impeaching these idiots as I type.
Look, I’m a white guy, and I made tons of my own mistakes. I lived in the same area as Georgetown Prep, I was white and overprivileged, and I grew up in a culture of common sexual exploitation that was, if anything, more sociopathic than Kavanaugh’s country-club suburbia. I called the dynamic predator/prey, and it was horrible. The goal was to get girls to either say ‘yes’ or at least not to openly say ‘no.’ I’m not going to go into it much, but yes, I was a dick, sometimes. I could be abusive. I was part of that culture.
But you can’t hide behind who you were. What we didn’t see then is glaring and obvious now. We know too much to pretend that sexual exploitation didn’t exist, or that it wasn’t evil. We can see the harm. What kind of guy would look at the damage they did to innocent people and not change? How awful are you if you keep abusing people because stopping makes you feel funny. That’s not masculinity; it’s psychosis.
